the first sacrament

perhaps it is the emotional climate of the recent days, or not, but i do have to say that nothing was as moving today as the classes that sr. terezinha and i taught for baptismal preparation. we are preparing about 30ish parents for their children to receive baptism - some are even getting baptized themselves, along with their children. we were so grateful to see that the third grade classroom was ready and prepared for us as soon as we arrived - the 3rd graders moved to the 2nd grade class, so that the empty classroom was simply for baptism prep. this school is so good to us.

i've never taught baptism classes before, and i don't even remember my own baptism. but what i can say, is that i feel like i am receiving my baptism all over again. i am learning about the symbols again: the sign of the cross, the white garment, the oil, the candle, the baptismal water...and their significance. sr. terezinha and i prepare these parents by going through the baptism ritual with the parents and trying our best to communicate to them, what this all means!

but yes, it is true, that is one of the struggles - trying to get them to understand how beautiful baptism is, and how this is a formal welcome into the family of God - a new birthday if you will. do they understand everything 100%? um, probably, realistically, not. but we trust the holy spirit in the midst of it all. we do what we can, and we pray a lot through it all. some do not speak english, some are illiterate, and really, truly, the majority are super tired as soon as they get to the school cause they pretty much "hike" an hour to an hour and a half to get to school. just like their kids. but this time, they're holding their babies with them.

we try to communicate to them too, that they, as the parents and god-parents, are responsible for bringing up their children, according to their new life in Christ. to prepare the parents, i have been reading the parts of the Priest, and the parents practice their responses...well, let me just say that reading the script of the Priest is pretty awesome for one thing (haha of COURSE i would say that), but also, it is some powerful stuff. it's really beautiful.

it came to the part of the script where we were going through the "concluding rites" and sr. t and i announced that that is the part where everyone was already baptized...sr. t said, "are you all happy?" they all started clapping and there were visible huge smiles on their faces. i looked at the back of the room, and one of the dads was holding his baby and starting clapping his baby's hands. he had the hugest smile on his face. i think that was really moving for me because he, himself, too, was also getting baptized, and he was so happy for his baby girl at the same time! it was absolutely priceless. and i don't normally get affected by cheesy stuff like that, but it was super genuine and joy-filled. the holy spirit was apparent in that moment. absolutely. :) i even noticed my voice crack a little, trying to resume reading the final blessing. ah it was a good moment! i'm grateful that i got to witness that.

today, i also got to teach one of the dads how to make the sign of the cross on his grown son's forehead. after class i showed him again how to do it, and he spoke to me of some of the struggles he was having with trying to get his son to switch schools. two other parents showed up, both blind, because they wanted to have their child baptized. one of the parents asked me to be her daughter's ninang (god-mother) because her daughter only received an "emergency" baptism in the sense that, when she was born, they thought she wasn't going to make it, so she had an "emergency" baptism - even though we explained that once you are baptized, you are baptized...she is still requesting a formal one.

every parent, every adult there had their own story. i watched one of the parents struggle to write her childrens' names because she herself was illiterate. some of the parents spoke to us personally because they couldn't attend all of the meetings because they had struggling work schedules. other parents talked to us about what the correct attire was because they didn't know if what they had, would suffice. some aunts and uncles showed up to try to get their nieces and nephews baptized because the childrens' parents have either abandoned their kids or because they are overseas. the list of cases go on and on...after the class, sister and i spend a good amount of time talking with the parents, figuring out the best way to deal with their personal situations. it's pretty cool - and we love doing it.

one of the parents spoke to me and asked me to be his daughter's ninang. i accepted of course, and turns out she is one of the cutest girls ever! every time i see her, she gives me this huge smile - we already have a connection. yay! :) i visited the church last week, and the parish secretary told me, oh, sister, you have so many god-children, huh? i said, are you kidding me? well, she was right. to my surprised, i looked at all of the typed up baptism certificates, and looks like i have 4! i thought i only had two..haha, and that was as of last week. it is probably up to 5 or 6 now. but i am happy to serve in that way, and also flattered that the parents chose me among their family members as well!

even though i told them i would only be a god-mother if they did not have anyone, i am ok with being among three or four ninangs/ninongs for some of the children. hahaha. in the meantime, looks like i have been commissioned to sing a song at the baptism program, which is also going to be celebrated on the feast of st. therese :) yay! though they will be changing the feast to october 2nd, to go along with a sunday. the parish secretary called me to also remind me to have my song prepared. haha, i'm happy to do it. we are all just hoping and praying that the coming typhoon doesn't hit that day...but, we shall see.

as sr. terezinha and i left the school with huge smiles on our faces, she explained to me how st. francis xavier, SJ (who mother cabrini eventually named herself after!) just baptized everyone and everyone and everyone on his missions...so much that his right arm was eventually super fatigued from the baptisms....we joked, and looked at each other, and in that instant we realized, hmmm that really might be us in the near future. hahaha, well, with father's blessing, out we go!

mission on paper

inside maryknoll's museum of living mission (ossining, NY)

as part of my preparation for my two-year mission in the philippines, i got to attend MISO (maryknoll international service orientation) held in ossining, NY (the headquarters of maryknoll). there, i got to join with other missioners/volunteers from other programs. during the program we got to have much reflection time, and much of my time i spent in the maryknoll museum of mission. i was able to capture some of the quotes on the awesome peace pole, but not all of em, and so for that, i was kinda disappointed!

BUT! about 2ish/3 months ago, one of my friends, anthony (maryknoll "explore my mission" video contest winner in 2009) was able to hang out with the two recent winners of the "explore my mission" contest up at the headquarters, and did me a huge favor and got me all the quotes.

and so, here they are (they are that good, that i never forgot about their existence! and made sure i got them sooner or later, somehow!):

"Change all your energies, all your potential, into selfless gifts for the other person. So be converted to love everyday."

"The matter of missions....lies at the very essence of catholicity"

"I choose to do God's work for the countless people overlooked, overworked and forgotten."

"A missioner goes to a place where he is needed but not wanted, and stays until he is wanted but not needed."

"Mission is the search and encounter for the meaning of life"

"Go into all the world and proclaim the good news to the whole creation. Mark 16:15"

"A life of service and uttermost simplicity is the best preaching"

"Mission is to go to a no-place, to serve God's no bodies and, in the eyes of the world, to accomplish no-thing. In this, may we realize we are at the center of what time, meaning and history are all about."

"Mission is like breathing-there are times when God draws us in and times when God sends us out."

"The missionary vocation is a grace from God empowering me to give witness to the divine compassion, which invites all to the abundance of life"

"The life and vocation of a missionary brother is not complicated. He is called to service, hospitality and prayer."

"Our vocation is to cooperate with the Holy spirit in renewing the face of the earth."

"As a missioner, I try to draw others close to god, but the truth is that they're the ones who evangelize me."

"We are all called to mission."

"As long as someone in the world lacks food, our daily eucharist is incomplete."

"If we really understand love-love taught to us by God in Jesus- will we not lay down our very lives for others?"

"Is not thus giving of self to others for gods sake the purpose of Christian living?"

"Work on the missions demands that you undergo a martyrdom- if not a real one, at least a living on."

"While my faith doesn't change, its cultural expression may. This is part of being a missioner."

...and we can also thank him for getting me the Maryknoll reflection books - daily inspiration, some daily prayers and anytime prayers, Maryknoll produces some really amazing mission material. :)

here's a video i also made from that experience (enjoy!) :

igorot by association

because a year ago, i found out the local bookshop held poetry slams...i entered its first, entered every one after, and this is the most recent...one year later, baguio city has cotinuously captured my heart, and i got to share this one with some of my favorite artists, poets, and creative minds. enjoy!

joking became a reality

 so today at SLU (baguio city), after sharing my vocation/mission testimony with a couple of classes, i was hanging out in the lounge for all of the religious who were involved with vocation week. i enjoyed it because i got to reconnect with some of the sisters i met last year, and got to meet some new priests - many from manila and out of town. exciting stuff!

so i was talking with one of the priests who has done mission work in bolivia, peru and japan (his congregation specifically works cross-culturally, he is filipino), and he was super funny and approachable, at least from the conversations i had with him in the past few days. and so, i was joking with him after i found out he was going to be the presider at tonight's mass.

and so i said, "hey father! you're going to be the priest for tonight? did you prepare your homily yet? can you make sure it's not boring please?" and so he laughed and said, "haha, no, i was just going to read through the book." and i said, "i just don't want to fall asleep ok?" and so he said, "ok, do you want to do the homily?" and i said, "haha, yeah father, ok, i'll do the homily - i'll just read what you were going to read! haha!" - but of COURSE i was joking!

some of the sisters present in the room, interjected and said, "no father, you have to do the homily." and even then, the Missionary Sisters were not sponsors of tonight's mass! but he said that none of the other congregations were going to be present...! and so then, he shared stories about how in many of his experiences on mission, it is the members of the community who share during the homily and so he continued, "crystal, i'm not going to read anything! can you do the homily?" i looked at the time. it was 3:20pm and i was going to speak at a class at 4-5pm and then mass was at 5pm! but ahhhh! i agreed. :)

i scrambled to find my Anawim Way with the daily readings for the day, looked through the Gospel, and boom! of course, today is the day for Our Lady of Sorrows. oy vey. how was i going to speak on this! i spoke with father for about 5 minutes, we talked about a few things, and then, i was entrusted and commissioned to give the homily! and so, i ran to the chapel, and after 23 minutes of praying, looking to the Gospel for inspiration from the holy spirit, and eventually writing down these thoughts, this is what i came up with:

Good evening everyone! My name is Crystal Catalan and I am serving as a missioner alongside the Missionary Sisters of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. But today is not about me, but rather, today is a Feast where we look to Mary as a woman of compassion, strength, and incredible faith and love - Our Lady of Sorrows. It is about how we may connect with our Lady.


With Jesus on the Cross, there stood his mother. His mother feeling pain, sadness, indescribably emotion, but she was there - waiting, loving, and accompanying.


Jesus says to John, "Behold your mother." And with this, in turn, Mary is too, our spiritual mother. She is the gift that Jesus has given to us. Just as the disciples took in Our Lady of Sorrows and were entrusted with her care, so too, are we entrusted with our brothers and sisters in community. Just as Mary serves as an example of compassion, we too, can look to her as a model of what it means to have a heart full of love.


Earlier today, Fr. Rolly asked me a vocation question. He asked, "Crystal, why is it that you are doing what you are doing? How is it that you made a shift from life in California to a missionary life that led you to New York and now the Philippines?" My answer?


My heart was moved with compassion as I saw the suffering during my first experiences of mission in Manila. I saw the orphans, worked with the recovering prostitutes, I saw the hungry - those physically in need, but also spiritually. And I had to act - NOT as a Savior, but as a daughter of God wanting to be in solidarity with the pains of my brothers and sisters.


And this, I feel, is my gift - to have a heart that is moved to action. I can sing songs, write poetry, and read stories of these pains, but i had to DO something, and God has called me to the Philippines to serve.


One of my favorite quotes is by Frederick Buechner when he says, "the place where God calls you is where your deep gladness meets the world's greatest needs." And so, with that, may we continue to ask for the intercession of our mother, Mary, as we uncover how it is that we may best serve the living faces of Christ that we encounter everyday: in our families, our classrooms, barangays, and our schools.


As Vocation Week continues, I ask you, what is it that YOUR heart into compassion? How is that YOU can serve in giving the gift of your life to serve others? 

May God bless you and may we everyday spend our lives in gratitude for the mission that God has called each one of us to live out in faith and love.

the theme of this year's vocation week is "Gratitude and Mission" and so i tried my best to tie it in somehow. i was so extremely grateful for this opportunity to share with the entire Church my reflection on this Gospel and how it is linked to my faith journey on mission. as i was writing, that's what i did - i wrote, reflected, paused, then just began writing again, and prayed for clarity through the whole process, remembering that everything i say is to direct the congregation to Jesus. things always turn out better when intentions are set that way: God-centered. :) the holy spirit really pulled through for me on this one! sr. terezinha and i are reading one of the Pope's books together and she reminded me, "just see with the eyes of the dove [holy spirit]" which is one of the themes that we have been encountering through our book discussion. and so, i kept that in mind.

at the end of mass during the announcements, Fr. thanked me and said how nice it was to have a lay person give the homily - and a woman, at that. i feel extremely blessed that in the few moments of conversation that i had with him, he entrusted me to speak to the congregation. and now, i can say that i officially gave my first homily! :) God. is. good. :)

Mama Mary, Our Lady of Sorrows, pray for us.

saints in modern color

stumbled upon these images and thought i would share some that are of significance to me. couldn't find one for mother cabrini, but i will make a request for one! :) enjoy!

this is what my mission looks like.

coming back from world youth day, we got to share our experiences with the children of SOSCFI...we got to teach the children this fun action song that one of the cabrini pilgrims from argentina taught us (it was super fun when we did it altogether in spain!) and so therefore, of course we had to teach it to the children at SOSCFI! and then, we taught them "firmes en la fe," the WYD Madrid Theme Song!

here's the video: 


with mother cabrini's feast day coming up in november, i thought it would also be important to bring up three key facts of mother cabrini - and the three words/phrases i came up with to teach them about were: violets, mission, and the sacred heart of jesus...

violets: super symbolic because as a child, little francisca cabrini would put violets in little boats in the water and say, these are missionaries that are going to spread the love of God all over the world...beginning with china. :) ok, maybe those weren't her exact words, but that was her intent with the violets!
mission: mother cabrini set up 67 missions around the world. she was so mission-oriented, she founded a missionary order. :) everything about mother cabrini is mission. to be a bearer of the love of Christ!
the sacred heart of jesus: mother cabrini had a strong devotion to the sacred heart of jesus. so much that she founded the missionary sisters of the sacred heart of jesus. so beautiful!

and so, i wrote the words/phrases on paper, explained them and stuck them on the wall right next to the countries where the cabrini pilgrims came from. :)

Norlyn, one of the WYD pilgrims, sharing her experience with SOSCFI!

Mary Grace, another WYD pilgrim, teaching SOSCFI how to pray the rosary

the exercise we did at WYD for our cabrini family formation included virtues, names, phrases all affiliated with mother cabrini, and we all talked about their significance. the papers had the words/phrases face down, and then individuals were asked to randomly uncover the words. it was silent as this was going on, as if it was suspense to see what the word/phrase would be! :)

something that i found beautiful during that exercise was that, the mother cabrini facts and the stories i knew about her, were exactly the same as what the other cabrini pilgrims learned about mother cabrini in their own countries. the facts, the stories, the charism, is strong and rich all across the missions - near and far. THAT was beautiful.

complete with singing, laughing, smiles, sharing faith journeys/stories, talking/teaching about mother cabrini, sharing mission and experiences, and feeling super energized throughout it all, this is what my mission looks like. :) enjoy!

heart to heart

today was a really good day overall, but one of my experiences this morning had an impact on me that has lasted with me till the evening time [right now].  

today is our "mission of teaching" day and i was so excited to be back - it seems that it has been like a month or so since i made my last visit due to me being gone in madrid for world youth day and then because of weather conditions! it was so nice running around with the kids again and forgetting that i probably look absolutely HUGE compared to these small 5-8 year olds that have become my playmates.

one of the teachers told me that one of our parents that we sponsor through our foundation was incredibly ill, but now she is out of the hospital. i asked, who is taking care of her? they told me, their special needs child who is 19 and in the first grade. i asked how can this be because he himself can not fully take care of himself 100%. the teachers told me that though he lacks motor skills and can not speak, he is the one that has been entrusted to take care of her and he is capable. i was absolutely shocked, but more sad about the reality of the situation...meanwhile, his 4 other brothers and sisters are in school, however, they have not had the best attendance because they live super far and do not have money for transportation to their school, and no one to accompany them as they go to school. their father is a carpenter, but of course, that is only an on-off kind of thing - it is not a stable profession. it was a blessing that one of the teachers was able to give their family some money to take her to the hospital. :(

to make this heart matter hurt even more, is that one of the social worker interns debriefed me on the conditions of one of the children in that family. that child is one of the students i teach and i learned she has scabies - i am not a medical professional by ANY means, but in those 30 seconds that she showed me where on her knee the scabies had really made its mark, literally, i thought to myself, oh baby jesus - no. she got it from her brother who got it from his classmate. meanwhile, she was given medication by one of her mother's friends to hopefully cure her skin, but of course, her mother's friend is not a medical professional either.

today i learned that there is just need after need and it really does hurt my heart when i am face to face with the poor who are suffering - really, with no food on their table to eat. today i felt myself getting frustrated when the kids weren't paying attention to the prayers i was teaching them...and then i thought to myself, crystal, you try to wake up at 5am everyday, to walk a couple of miles, and then cross a river, and then walk another long distance to get to school. and so, gentleness was the key to my teaching for the day.

so with that, i ask for your prayers for the families that we sponsor through our foundation and for an increase in courage, strength, and perseverance for the parents, especially, who work extra extra hard to provide for their families. especially with the typhoons and all of the heavy rains, many crops and land [the livelihood of our families] were damaged, resulting in a great loss of profit, so this is an extra challenging time for them. please keep these families close to your heart, and may we be filled with gratitude for the blessings that God still provides us with, even amongst these conditions, and though we can not always recognize the graces, may we still be filled with thanksgiving.

Me/You and God's Work

....thought i would share this reflection with you today, as it was the daily reading assigned for today. when i think about the life that i am living here in baguio city, i truly do see it as a gift - even amidst the challenges and difficulties. is it possible that all of this (my life, your life) really is one big blessing? absolutely. and so i invite you, to think of the ways that God has invited YOU to participate in the beautiful world He has created. YES, it IS possible that your life can be one magnificent, beautiful, free gift...and so, what do we do with it? ...i think that's for us to figure out - something good. :)

---

     Jesus challenges us to participate in God's Work - as he did. This is not how we commonly see things. What needs to be done has commonly been seen as our work. God enters into the picture as someone who can help us do our work. We must pray, it is said, for God's grace. In fact what needs to be done is God's Work, and it is we who can be said to help by participating in God's Great Work. God's grace or free gift is best seen as the privilege of participating.

     But first we need to become free and humble enough to do so. We need to recognize that we ourselves are products of God's Work. But we are also invited to participate in the process of becoming co-artists and co-creators of the future.

     We do this by allowing God to work in and through us. When we are radically free...divine energy can flow through us unhindered.

     God's Work, like God's Wisdom, is revolutionary. It turns the world upside down. We participate by adding our voice to the many prophetic voices that are speaking out boldly in our day and age.

     Jesus' Way is a path that will lead us to the radical freedom that enables us to participate in God's Great Work of Art.

     God's Work sometimes appear to be slow. Yet precisely because it is God's Work, the future is secure. There is hope for the universe and for each of us as individuals. When I die, my ego, my false self, will be destroyed once and for all, but my true self will continue forever in God, the Self of the Universe.

- Albert Nolan, from Jesus Today: A Spirituality of Radical Freedom (taken from A Maryknoll Book of Inspiration by Michael Leach and Doris Goodnough)