I've Moved!

I've moved! 

Check out: crystalcatalan.com

for blog entires, resources, and inspirations for the journey.

Cheers!

[Cabrini Style] Arts. Research. Scholarship.

Last week, Cabrini held its annual Arts, Research, and Scholarship Symposium which featured the creative accomplishments and research on various topics from Cabrini students.

Wandering around, it was pretty cool to ask the students about the research they conducted over the course of the past couple semesters and to learn about their results and conclusions.

I remember asking a number of the students what their motivation was for choosing the specific subject of their research, and at first they said, well, it was an assignment...but then, the more they did research and explored deeper into their work, they wanted to find conclusions and obtain the results themselves. The students worked hard (you could tell!) and they were knowledgeable about the research they conducted. Bravo Cabrini students!

Here are a few pictures of the posters and the students that put in great effort and energy towards their projects:

This freshman student conducted his research on "Dating Violence." I told him how I was happy that he was a male looking into this issue, and he shared with me how his whole group was comprised of other men, and he was most surprised about how prevalent this issue is, especially among college-aged students. Next steps? He said that with the knowledge he has, he wants to be able to turn others away from dating violence. Sweet.

This group helped out at Philabundance, the region's largest food bank and hunger relief organization.

This group has connected with Cabrini Ministries in Swaziland, via our recent visitors that came in January and are looking further into ways that they may support the mission. The group provided them with cameras, and hope they will be able to showcase the photographs taken in Swaziland, in Fall 2013.

Patton...comparing history with the film.

Danielle, a graduating senior, explored the correlation between religious beliefs and media usage, and how that affects attitudes towards dating, relationships, and sexuality. She's going to be a great teacher someday! She already is!

Donald, one of our CRS Ambassadors, conducted research on immigration and the perception of college students on the issue. As an advocate for immigrants, it was great to see him speak with others about his research. One of the staff members asked him for his opinion on the ECG courses, and of course, he shared how a great majority of his ECG knowledge and expertise came from classes with Jerry and through the comm department. (no bias from me!)

This group conducted a marketing campaign for the issue of Anti-Bullying, especially on campuses. With the increase of violence among students and bullying at that, this was a video they created to further their efforts.

Lastly, one of the classes that I worked closely with, was Global Leadership. Comprised of individuals from various majors, they took on the issue of Human Trafficking. They spent their year learning more about the issue, and in terms of leadership, were given the task of researching a "not-so-popular" leader. During their session in the afternoon, each member of the class shared a brief bio on their chosen leader, and shared their reflections on what they learned about human trafficking.  It was great to hear how the students drew connections between themselves and their selected leader. If they were into sports, they chose a sports figure who was active in an area of working towards the common good. One of the students who had a strong affinity with music, chose a musician. The anti-human trafficking video they created, with the super duper help of Laura and Megan, is shown here:


The idea of this video is to create a campaign on the issue of human trafficking, as it has hit home locally here, near King of Prussia. This video serves as a challenge to other college campuses, to research more into the issue, and to also create a video for advocacy and awareness. Please spread this and share the hotline number with others!

This Symposium emphasizes that insightful and wonderful work is being done with and by college students. Be hopeful for our future!

Now, I just pray that this momentum keeps itself up after leaving the college walls. Great job everyone!

CRS. Integrity. Stewardship. Relationships. Learning.

A couple of weeks ago, a few of our non-graduating CRS Ambassadors had the opportunity to be part of a University Consultation held at the CRS Headquarters in Baltimore. Comprised of other local Catholic colleges and universities who held CRS Ambassador chapters or were looking to start one on their campus, there was great representation from faculty, staff, and energetic students! 

One of my personal highlights was when I came to realize that the facilitator and organizer of the entire program was Lou - an Augustinian Volunteer who was assigned to USD while I was a senior on campus! Six years later, we were reunited on the east coast through CRS! Small world indeed, this world of volunteers and service organizations. It was great to see him!

After exchanging ideas, best practices, and having the opportunity to share CRS Chapter experiences, as faculty, staff, and students, we then got to take a tour of the CRS Headquarters.

Basically...this was the Disneyland for any individual interested in International Development and Aid. Seriously. And, if you're a comm major, all the comm equipment was an awesome added bonus! :) This was a great little trip in the week, and I believe it gave the group an added sense of CRS Ambassador pride in representing Cabrini College. I mean, it did for me at least! Looking forward to seeing where the CRS Chapters make their next moves on college campuses. There's lots of energy and great work to be done. I'm feeling hopeful!

So blessed to have had this opportunity to see where the "magic" happens - well, at least the backbone of it. Thank you Jerry for getting us home safely, driving us through a number of thunderstorms! Yay!

A definitely inspiring day.

Check out the pics:

Brandon and Emily presenting some of their thoughts...

Jerry was even included in Lou's presentation!

After a packed day at CRS HQ, it was time to head out!

View from the top of HQ

Our fearless leader, Jerry!

In the "Situation Room" - the clocks. Amazed. CRS is everywhere!

Where CCGP and CRS hold their webcasts and other press-related events

Sue Toton and Jerry!! Villanova and Cabrini - TOGETHER!

Jerry loving the equipment. Of course.

Pretty day in Baltimore

And that my friends, was our beautiful day in Baltimore. We all need inspiration and motivation to keep goin' and keep working for social justice. It was extremely enlightening to feel the energy in the room among the members of the colleges, and to realize that we are all working towards the common good to achieve social justice, peace, and change in the world. Support is GREAT. Yes! Onward and onward!

what do you do?

what do you do when you see a situation going on in front of you that you know is wrong? how do you react? do you turn away? do you try not to get involved? or do you stare?

or do you start to look away while still thinking to yourself...what should i do?

a thousand scenarios come to your mind of what could happen to you if you step in...but there are also a thousand possibilities of what could happen after you leave the scene.

the past couple of weeks, i've been hearing more and more of these situations. here are some that have found a place for pondering and reflection in my mind:

* one of the professors who i work with shared with me a story from her recent travel overseas. she was walking along the street in Lithuania, minding her own business, when she saw a young girl probably in her mid-teens in not-so-good shape, begging for money. she then saw her being brought into an alley and being pushed between a couple of larger men. this professor being the activist warrior that she is, followed the girl into the alley, and acted like an innocent tourist. she had her camera on hand, got closer to the girl (who she said smelled like drugs, sex, alcohol - the whole deal), and asked someone to see if she could take a picture with her...cause that's what tourists do, right? just like a tourist. well, for this professor, she mostly wanted to get a picture of this girl and the situation, because in her mind, this very well may have been a missing child's case, or who knows. strategic, huh? that was her method of breaking it up, hopefully relieving some tension in that situation, and snapping photos of a particularly harmful situation. unfortunately, pics of the others didn't come out as clear, cause her stealthy hands were covering the lenses. these pics will then be forwarded to proper local organizations that deals with these matters. would you intervene like that?

* in one of my classes, one of the brothers was talking about a situation when he didn't know what to do - he's an ex-army guy, pretty big, and as he was leaving the store, he saw this man beating his son pretty bad...like, very bad. brother didn't know how to react because hey, let parents discipline their children the way they want, right? or, no? if you see something like that, how do you react? he said the man was bigger than him too, so he was obviously a little bit more intimidated. / one of the suggestions in our class was, to divert the individual's attention, like, potentially ask the person for the time - anything to get that person out of the daze of beating his child. another case where you are sitting in a restaurant and at the other table, there is a ruckus of a mother yelling at her child for spilling a drink. do you just listen to the noise going on at the booth right next to you? or do you ask if everything is ok?

do you keep minding your own business?

* how about in new york city? when you see a mother yelling at her child reallllll bad, cussing up a storm and starting to hit her kid on the subway? do you step in?

we may have learned/are currently learning about these issues in our classes...we read books, we have discussions...but what happens to our reactions in real life? are we so bold then? or do these first-hand experiences provide us with a different perspective?

Covenant House - Philadelphia

I recently had the great opportunity to join one of our professors and her class to visit Covenant House - Philadelphia. Covenant House is an organization that serves homeless youth - many of who have been victims of human trafficking and prostitution. Operating 24 hours a day, the shelter in Philadelphia has 51 beds and plenty of mats, should the need present itself to offer a safe haven for additional youth. On an annual basis, over 500 kids are served at this site, and it is their hope that the youth will take advantage of the programming to better themselves and keep themselves safe, out of harm's way.

Anti-Trafficking Shirt from Baguio City, Philippines

Of course, that's not always the conclusion of their stories - they are free to leave and sometimes they get caught up right in the situation they were in before.

One of the programs offered by Covenant House is in Street Outreach, in which they go out on the streets and have conversations with whoever they find that may be in great need of one of their services - food, shelter, clothing, a safe space - basic needs. Many times the youth they come in contact with are involved with prostitution and as a result, have to utilize a number of strategies to be careful when engaging in these conversations, especially since their pimp or "john" may be within a distance. The last thing they want to do is get the victim involved in an even greater conflict.

Also, trainings are essential. In many cases, trainings with hotel staff and maintenance workers are very much needed and conducted by the Covenant House staff because they are the ones on the front line every day, seeing who comes in and out of their doors. While we always have to be cautious about generalizing what a "trafficked" victim may look like, it is important to be aware and always alert.

...Don't act like you don't see what's going on, or not want to get involved...

The staff shared stories of how one of the girls that found refuge in Covenant House, was trafficked. She connected with her friend from the South, stayed here locally in Pennsylvania with her son, was promised to be taken care of, and the next thing you know, she was trafficked more than 20 times. It was then that the Philadelphia Anti-Trafficking Coalition stepped in, got involved, and started to track down the perpetrators.

They then continued and shared a story of a younger girl around the age of 14, who worked at a nearby salon and her uncle took her to the doctor for a check-up because of medical issues. Turns out, she had numbers upon numbers of STDs and STIs. She was out there in the public every day, working in a salon during the day, in the view of everyone, but in the evening, she had another job that brought her those physical and mental wounds. The question is, "How come no one every wondered or asked why this young girl was not in school?" They stressed, trafficking victims may not always be so discreet...instead, there are victims that are everyday seen in the general public, and so we must train ourselves to be aware and to be alert to these realities that could literally be staring at us in the face. And the traffickers are not always strangers - they are sometimes in the victims' families themselves.

Of course, this is not to say that we are to label and start dialing in on our phones when we see a 14-year old girl working in a restaurant on the weekend or what not... she could be the daughter of the owner! But, it is important to be aware.

This is not only a city problem in major cities like Philadelphia, New York, Los Angeles, and Chicago. This is an everywhere problem, with one of the first cases of trafficking taking place in Delaware County, Pennsylvania. Very local.

The average age of those entering prostitution is between 12-14 years old. 12-14 years old.

12 to 14 years old. Unreal.

And so, with this, it is my hope and desire that we continue to engage in these conversations, have these discussions with our peer groups and stop the demand for prostitution. It is not "cool" to be a pimp, and people are not commodities. This could be your sister, your daughter, your son, your brother. Because people can be used over and over and over again, it is a much more lucrative business than drugs and weapons. A $32 billion dollar industry. Wow.

Needless to say, I was left inspired once again by the efforts of Covenant House and saw that truly, we can each play a part in making a positive change in society. Let's respect one another, not use one another, and try to build up, rather than tear down each other.

Looking forward to the day when we can sing songs of peace and speak out, rather than remain silent.

Solidarity [Food Fast style]

Last Sunday, the CRS Ambassadors put on a Food Fast program - a day to be in solidarity with our brothers and sisters around the world who experience hunger on a daily basis. This day was not only about "going without" food, to experience for a moment what it's like to not eat a couple of meals, but rather, it was filled with education pieces and hands-on activities that allowed each participant to reflect and discuss these issues of food and water insecurity, both internationally and locally.

When people make comments to me along the lines of, "students don't care about social justice" or "students are too busy these days to think outside of themselves," I think to myself, sure, there are those groups of students - hell, there are those adults in the world...but, this Food Fast Day would give you insight into a group of justice-minded students. Listening to the discussions that go on in our weekly meetings for CRS Ambassadors (at 9pm, mind you), these passionate individuals would prove you wrong. 

...we just have to give them the space to have these discussions - and more importantly, allow their creativity to flow in a productive, focused way. oh, and it does!

We started off the day with some resources from Bread For the World, in which we watched the film, "A Place At The Table." Think domestically. Think a couple of miles away - Philadelphia. Here's the trailer:

"A Place At The Table" 

• "Charity is a great thing - but it's not the way to end hunger."
• "If another country were doing this to our kids, we would be at war."
• "One out of two kids in the United States, will at some point, be on food assistance.

Later, we had the "families" gather water from the pond in front of our school, carry the water back to the center of campus, only to find that the water was contaminated (simulating that this is the case in many areas of the world who lack access to clean, drinkable water). They then gathered wood for a fire, and fruit (hidden by yours truly and JZ) to make a delicious fruit salad later for supper.

We then studied the conditions of food insecurity in other countries like Guatemala and the Democratic Republic of the Congo, and were faced with having to make recommendations of how they could go about survival, given their bare circumstances. That was pretty tough, and in a number of those cases, we were all left speechless when posed with the question, "So what should the families do?" In many of these cases, it seemed like we exhausted all possibilities...

After examining various conditions in other countries, we then took a look at how we would go about providing for ourselves and our "families" with shelter, food and insurance, with a minimum wage salary, kids, and a partner, here in Radnor, PA. First, it gave the students a realistic insight into what it's like to be an "adult," and secondly, it reflected the daily hardships faced by families with a monthly income of a couple thousand US dollars. That was tough.

What made this retreat meaningful and inspiring, was the spirit of all who attended. There was a strong camaraderie, desire to learn more and voice frustrations with the system, and a wealth of passion for creating positive change in the world.

Success? Absolutely. Great job, CRS Ambassadors! Continue to be inspired, and inspire others! And so: let the advocacy continue...!

Email Your House Representative

peace and fullness of life.

Often we anxiously seek the will of God,

as if God had gleefully hidden dreams for us

deep in unfathomable places.

As if it were God's intention

that our whole lives be spent 

in endless searching for signs and directions

buried in obscurity.

The will of God is that which brings us 

peace and fullness of life.

The will of God is the seed of our dreams

ever gestating with possibility

and longing to leap forward

scattering new and surprising blessings

in our gray reality.

- Edwina Gateley

love is...patient

 Holy Thursday!

To prepare for the Holy Triduum, despite being far from my community at St. Monica's in Los Angeles and my community in the PI...through the gift of technology, I have been listening to the morning meditations conducted by Dr. Jim Finley. Dr. Jim Finley is a Merton scholar and master of the "Contemplative Way." He lived as a Trappist monk and Thomas Merton was his spiritual director. Um, awesome. :)

When I lived in LA, I attended his weekly 5:30am meditations during Lent, and they were absolutely beautiful. What a blessing it is to have found that this year's meditations are recorded - along with all of the cool audio/visual links that St. Monica's provides.

Here, he talks about the verse: "Love is Patient." This could not have come at a better time.

** I loved the recordings  and they have all helped me tremendously, so I transcribed them - here it is for you!**

prayer and contemplation - Fr. Rudy, SJ in Cavite, Philippines

This particular recording can be found here: Dr. Jim Finley from The Contemplative Way

I was thinking this year, I base this series of reflections on love. And, we're always thinking about what we're gonna give up for Lent, and say, we can practice giving up not being loving - we can give that up. And, ask God for the grace to be more loving, because God is love and through love we become one with God and one with each other. And the passage i would like to base these reflections on is the celebrated passage in First Corinthians Chapter 13 on Love.

  If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.
    Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant,does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
    Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part; but when the perfect comes, the partial will be done away. When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known. But now faith, hope, love, abide these three; but the greatest of these is love.

and i would like to start first with "love is patient." and i'd like to meditate on patience as a way of life. that, it often happens in life that we find ourself in the midst of a hurtful situation - in a hurtful situation from which we cannot easily or quickly free ourselves. it goes on and on, and we realize, it's gonna take a while.

this hurtful situation can be a medical symptom in our body, it can be psychological problems, depression, anxiety, self-sabotaging behavior, addiction...it can be problems in a relationship, that are very difficult to even approach, much less resolve, but there are things that weigh us down and from which we cannot quickly or easily free ourselves.

if we flip it around, we can also say, that there are goals in life, things that we hope for, things we believe in, things we seek to achieve and we discover we cannot easily achieve them. that it takes effort, and perseverance, and we're gonna have to hang in there, and lean into it, and keep working on it. life's like this.

and what we find in these situations that as the difficulty in freeing ourselves from suffering, the difficulty in reaching the desired goal - is that, it is tempting, but it is not helpful to be impatient. surely, it's not helpful to be impatient to the point that we give up. because if we give up and walk away, we abandon ourself. if we give up getting past the suffering, we fall into despair in the midst of suffering. if we give up on our dream, walk away, we never reach our dream. so then it's not helpful to give up.

likewise, we find it's not helpful to use force - that we're going to apply more pressure, and make it happen. this is not helpful. because when we use force, we engage in violence - and we try to make life happen on our terms. and we just make things worse. likewise, it doesn't help to get angry that you can't make it happen - that the universe will not cooperate with your plans. and you quickly discover you can't make anybody in your life do anything, and you can't even make yourself do some things.

because there are habits in the the mind and heart that do not easily go away. and so here we are, here we are. engaging in such things, asking for the grace to be patient. to be patient. to not lose heart. don't walk away, don't use force. but lean into it, in an ongoing, persevering, patient way.

and when we live like this, we begin to discover that here maybe, it was most important - is not the goal we were reaching for. nor maybe it's not most important that we get past the suffering, that we want so much to be free from. we begin to realize that in patience, we are being transformed into a patient person. and maybe what matters most is the transformation - and love, that patience brings.

you see this in people who have been transformed in long suffering, who have not fallen into despair, or who have not become bitter. you see it in people who are ripe with just lots of deep sobriety from addiction. you see it in people who are dedicated to a cause they deeply believe in and does not come without a price. you see it in people who are struggling with difficulties and patiently move on day by day. and, you see this quality in people, auspicious, graciousness about them. they're good people to be with. and it's good to become such a person.

and here i think we see the spirituality of patience. there's a famous prayer of Teresa of Avila sometimes called the "Bookmark of Teresa of Avila." i think when she died, they found it as a bookmark, hence it's name in one of her books.

let nothing disturb thee
let nothing frighten thee
all things are passing
God alone remains
patience obtains all things

and here's the thing - all these struggles that we're going through, all the things we're trying to get past, are passing. and the self that's trying to get through them is passing. all the goals we see, as nobel as they are, attained or unattained, they are all passing. everything that begins in time, ends in time - it's all ashes. it's all turning to ashes. but in the midst of all that's passing away there is the love that never passes away. and in the unexpected intimacy of the patient effort, we begin to experience His deathless love in the intimacy of our minds and hearts - it surprises us. we didn't expect it. it calls for a shift in perception - a shift in an understanding, like a deeper way to understand what it means to understand...about what really matters - what really counts.

that God alone remains; patience obtains all things. just wait long enough, none of us will be here. all will be swept away. but there is in the fleetingness of our lives, the eternality of love that intimately gives itself to us in patience, in patience. and maybe this is what it's about. this is what it's about.

and so, maybe we could see that the whole gospel story is the story of the revelation of patience. Jesus was hanging on the cross as love crucified being patient with us - he hung there, watching them gambling for his clothes, casting lots, and who was gonna get his cloak. not a happy outcome. but he never gave up on us, never turned against us. "Father, forgive them, they know not what they do."

how patient God is with us. and how we can taste the infinite patience of God and the willingness to be led by God to be patient with ourselves, patient with each other, patient with the situation, and so i think then, here is our prayer - our meditation.

you can sit with these 30 minutes in reflective prayer. who are the people in your life who have been patient with you and for who you are immensely grateful to have? who are the people that let you know how grateful they are that you're patient with them? and how blessed you are to be blessed in seeing how grace is working in your life? what are these relational realities? what is the suffering that has been caused by the people who have not been patient with you? and the suffering that's been caused because you've not been patient with them and with yourself? and how to ask God for the grace of patience.

or you can take a more contemplative approach of wordless prayer - sit still, sit straight - present, open and awake - neither clinging to nor rejecting anything, like an unlearned child in quiet awareness of the breathing.

if you want to use the word, "i love you, i love you," as your prayer of your breath - where you inhale - silently inhale God's "i love you" that is life itself and when you exhale, give yourself to the love that gives itself to you. and sit that way that for 30 minutes. do not daydream, do not fall asleep, do not slip away into thinking, but sit straight in the virginal immediacy of this love.

and if you try to sit that way for 30 minutes, you'll discover you need to be very patient with yourself. because you will not do well at it - but the ability to endlessly circle back to reinstate the intention to be simply present, sitting here in silence, you can learn to be patient. and learn to be patient. and in the silence of this prayer, experience God's infinite patience for you.

those in the background

this sure makes you think about the people in the background. who are the people that grew our food? who made the clothes we are wearing? the bags we are carrying? who put their lives in danger to provide us with some of the everyday items we use? 

this sure makes me think about the people in the background.

the life of a coffee bean. this community in yagyagan, benguet, showed me how they prepare the coffee beans, and then sell it to the canadians who come by to collect the prepared goods.

Who Baked the Bread?
Katherine Dale Makus

Who baked the bread
That Jesus blessed
And broke, and shared
That Passover supper, when he said,
"This is my body
Broken for you"?
Who made the wine,
When he passed the cup,
Saying, "This is my blood,
The blood of the covenant,
Shed for you and for many.
The fruit of the vine
I shall not taste again
Until I taste it new
In the Kingdom of God"?
Who made the wine?

Was it a woman who tended the vine,
Pressed the grapes, and made the wine;
Who planted the field, threshed the wheat,
And baked the bread for others to eat?

And afterwards, did a woman come
To clear the cup; to mop,
Perhaps, a single careless drop
Of wine, of God's blood shed;
To gather every scattered crumb
Of broken body, broken bread?

Did a woman, coming to clean the room,
Find grace in the fragments left behind,
As women, later, would come to find
An angel and an empty tomb?

Source: Daughters of Sarah (Mar-Apr 1988)

easter is my favorite!

ok...soooooo it's HOLY WEEK!

found this gem that i made 3 years ago...learn about the Pabasa ng Pasyon...one of my most favorite Filipino traditions. :) enjoy!

 

my easter chronicles:

three years ago, i spent easter with my closest friends in boston - a couple of them were volunteering, some were getting their masters in teaching, and i met an awesome girl who i would eventually meet up with in the philippines when i was living there. 'cause well, she was coordinating a volunteer program for her organization too! so good. AND we all played bowl of nouns without end. :) i heart my social-justice minded, faithful, fun, supportive, loving friends! social workers, teachers, campus ministers, good people. seriously.

two years ago, i spent easter on an 8-day silent retreat in baguio, and got super ill during the holy triduum days (thursday, friday, and saturday)..like, super ill. like, i remember thinking, "Lord, seriously? I'm trying to be all prayerful here during this superrrr 'holy' time, and I'm lying in bed, SICK and nauseous?" i remember during that time, we were in prayer, and then it was snack time, and i'm like, dang. all i really want is a banana (i needed potassium, clearly!) and they did not have many bananas readily available for the first five days, and whadda ya know...that day for snack, we had bananas! talk about GRACE FROM GOD!

i then remember ditching the silent retreat in a taxi...yup, totally did it (super rebel, i know), went to town, bought pedialyte and had the kitchen staff store it for me in the refrigerator. AND i ate all of the biscuits and crackers they had available (it was all i could eat. boo.) the staff was so nice - i think they caught on that i was deathly ill (pretty much) and they kept giving me crackers. as much as i wanted to keep it on the down-low, i think i gave myself away when i started to crouch down during the stations of the cross. my stomach was hurting, and my priest was like, "crystal. stop fasting - go eat something!" i was like, i was definitely not fasting. my stomach was just hurting! haha, i think that was the problem. something did not sit right with my stomach. :(

sure enough...after taking medicine instructions that i received from my doctor via text message (what up PI), i started to feel better...when? Easter Vigil Mass! YAY! Hallelujah is right!

and last year, i spent easter on a five-day silent retreat in cavite - i decided to be all nature-like and rough-it a little bit...met one of the most amazing priests ever - pretty much, my male missionary twin, even though he's in his 80's...he reminded me of mr. miyagi...it was a silent retreat in a large communal room with like thirty other occupants? yup. totally. it was great! pretty sure the last night after easter vigil mass, i kept up the entire room cause i just kept laughing and telling stories. SO fun! because it was a silent retreat until the last evening, they were all trippin' out because they heard me speaking and realized i was a fil-am from california. haha, it was funny.

and this year...i'll be in DC with my cousin, andrew. he's our favorite librarian. hope there's cherry blossoms!

yay easter!

are you ready?

Woke up with the sun shining and my mind and body ready to take on this day! Decided to gather a little inspiration and prayer for the road, and this is what was placed in front of me:

 Everyone can contribute much that is good, and in that way trust is achieved. The common good will not be attained by excluding people. We can't enrich the common good of our country by driving out those we don't care for. We have to try to bring out all that is good in each person and try to develop an atmosphere of trust, not with physical force, but with a moral force that draws ot the good that is in everyone, especially in concerned young people.

Thus with all contributing all can build the beautiful structure of the common good, the good that we construct together, and that creates conditions of kindness, of trust, of freedom, of peace.      

- Oscar Romero, from The Violence of Love

you hear that? we all have a role in contributing to the "beautiful structure of the common good." Archbishop Oscar Romero spent his days working on behalf of the poor and speaking out against poverty and social injustices. He was assassinated while celebrating mass (coincidentally his death anniversary is coming up on March 24) at a small chapel in El Salvador.

Two weeks before his assassination, Archbishop Oscar Romero said the following, “I have often been threatened with death,”... “If they kill me, I shall arise in the Salvadoran people. If the threats come to be fulfilled, from this moment I offer my blood to God for the redemption and resurrection of El Salvador. Let my blood be a seed of freedom and the sign that hope will soon be reality.”

I truly believe there is all good, beautiful work that we can do with this life that we have been given - but it's up to each one of us to find out what that is, and how that looks like. How exciting! How can we ever be bored? There is so much work to be done!

Are you ready?

 

it's good to be here.

i can't remember the last time i had to write a paper more than two pages double spaced.

my assignment for my "Human Integration for the Religious Life" class is to write a 5-6 page double-spaced paper on how/what I have resonated with, with regards to the class material over the course of the semester. We read articles on Religious Life in the 21st Century, read some Buechner articles, discussed conversion and its challenges, self-appropriation, transcendence, and the list goes on...

my problem is not so much that i don't know what to write about... cause wow - there's A LOT to write about with regards to how i feel i have grown into "getting to know" myself again, after years of traveling and living abroad...but, the difficulty is moreso, how do i synthesize it all together, as i am still trying to make sense of it all?

i think that's what this paper is allowing me to do...to process things, AS i write them out, and to begin naming those experiences - the ones that gave me joy, and the ones that were painful and not joyful. AND the ones that made me laugh, and the ones that still remain so vivid in my mind and heart.

sure enough, i started writing just from one snippet of one moment, and it nearly took up a page. couple things - i most certainly will write a book in my lifetime (this 5-6 pager will probably be 5% of the prologue), and two, i am beginning to see how all of my experiences have truly been road signs to the next step. and so, the journey continues, and i am to remember, that nothing is wasted.

believe it.

here's a song for you: nothing is wasted by jason gray

it will come.

the word: call.

what am i doing? what am i all about?

this time of the year certainly seems to be the time when seniors in college are starting to freak out about "what's next?" after their cozy time in college, and it seems that it's in this time, others are looking into new jobs, new careers, new directions in life...perhaps it's because i'm working in higher education right now, that the year pretty much "ends" when the school year comes to a close in mid-may. and so, it's that time...

transition maybe?

the questions start coming out (or start to express themselves, rather!) -

what am i all about? what am i doing? what am i going to do with my major? do i like where i'm living? should i move?

wouldn't it be so much easier if the answers could just be given to us so obviously? easier - yes. but fun and free? hardly. i suppose that's where the excitement lies!

i remember when i was living in the philippines mid-way through my mission year, that i started seeing all over facebook: college acceptance posts, pictures of my friends' tummies who were expecting in june, summer weddings, and enthusiasm for what is to come. i had to remind myself, crystal, be confident in your call - keep seeking, keep going - you are right where you need to be. all will reveal itself in time.

in.time.

well, again, it is in this time, that i am reminded of the importance of checking in with myself and joyfully seeking that inner peace that lies inside....

pretty sure we will find in the various ends that we meet in our lives, that the answer has been inside us all along..it just takes time, that's all.

hope you get a chance on this beautiful sunday to ask yourself these same questions as well! :)

thanks henri nouwen for your inspiration once again:

So many terrible things happen every day that we start wondering whether the few things we do ourselves make any sense.  When people are starving only a few thousand miles away, when wars are raging close to our borders, when countless people in our own cities have no homes to live in, our own activities look futile. Such considerations, however, can paralyse us and depress us.

Here the word call becomes important.  We are not called to save the world, solve all problems, and help all people.  But we each have our own unique call, in our families, in our work, in our world.  We have to keep asking God to help us see clearly what our call is and to give us the strength to live out that call with trust.  Then we will discover that our faithfulness to a small task is the most healing response to the illnesses of our time.

Fast? Let's Feast!

Lent can't only be about fasting...there's SO much that we can learn to feast on, as well!

Lent should be more than a time of fasting.
It should also be a joyous season of feasting.
Lent is a time to fast from certain things and to feast on others.

It is a season to turn to God:
Fast from judging others; feast on the goodness in them.
Fast from emphasis on differences; feast on unity of all life.
Fast from apparent darkness; feast on the reality of light.
Fast from thoughts of illness; feast on the healing power of God.
Fast from words that pollute; feast on phrases that purify.
Fast from discontent: feast on gratitude.

Fast from anger; feast on patience.
Fast from pessimism; feast on optimism.
Fast from worry; feast on divine order.
Fast from complaining; feast on appreciation.
Fast from negatives: feast on affirmatives.
Fast from unrelenting pressures; feast on unceasing prayer.

Fast from hostility; feast on non-resistance.
Fast from bitterness; feast on forgiveness.
Fast from self-concern; feast on compassion for others.
Fast from personal anxiety; feast on eternal Truth.
Fast from discouragement; feast on hope.

Fast from facts that depress; feasts on truths that uplift.
Fast from lethargy; feast on enthusiasm.
Fast from suspicion; feast on truth.
Fast from thoughts that weaken; feast on promises that inspire.
Fast from shadows of sorrow; feast on the sunlight of serenity.
Fast from idle gossip; feast on purposeful silence.

Fast from problems that overwhelm; feast on prayer that supports.
- William Arthur Ward

Lent 2013

People sometimes ask the question, "What do you like better - Christmas or Easter?" While many people gladly say, "Christmas!," I'm the person who usually says "Easter!," but with the add-on, that it is Lent that is really my favorite season in the year.

After experiencing the 19th Annotation (here's a link I found about the 19th Annotation spiritual exercises) during my mission year with Cabrini Mission Corps in NYC, the hours I specifically spent in prayer during those 40 Lenten days were some of the most powerful spiritual experiences I have ever had. Having the opportunity to journey through contemplative prayer, and other forms of prayer using the spiritual exercises of St. Ignatius Loyola (ex. lectio divina, contemplative prayer, the examen, etc.) for those days during Lent, really changed my life.

And so, since then, Lent has become my most favorite time. It is, also, not necessarily a happy time full of celebrations, considering it follows the pain and suffering of Christ, but it is the spiritual journey that I seem to find most fruitful for me. Sure, we may "give up" things like chocolate, or facebook, meat, or trying our best not to judge people, or we may do things additionally, like, wake up 15 minutes early to read a passage from the Bible, or pray a rosary or a decade of the rosary everyday (clearly, I have thought of this), but moreso, getting an understanding for the meaning behind this season is what we're goin' for.  And that's what gets me.

Fast. It brings me back to trying my best to live simply and for me to recall what it is that I need, and what I can do without. Pray. This Lenten season is a check-in for me and my prayer life - am I just allowing my mind to run off and go in circles or am I spending time in prayer and contemplation with God? Almsgiving. And, how can I serve others with the things which I own or gifts/talents that I possess? For me, this season calls for a full on self-check in.

And then, before I know it... at the end of this windy, challenging road of reflecting on myself, and accepting my weakneses and imperfections, and loving all of those parts wholeheartedly, because they are what make me who I am... then it is Easter! Another reminder that, not just once a year, but every day, there is the promise of renewal and new life.

Amen? AMEN!

May you be blessed this Lenten season and draw closer to the One who loved you first.

And remember:

"To achieve its goal, voluntary simplicity must be undertaken in the spirit of adventure.... Richard Gregg, who coined the term in 1936, once complained to Gandhi that while he had no trouble giving up most things he couldn't let go of his books. Gandhi told him he shouldn't try: "As long as you derive inner help and comfort from anything, you should keep it." He pointed out that if you give things up out of a sense of duty or self-sacrifice, they continue to preoccupy you and clutter your mind." - Philip Slater, Wealth Addiction

Check out the links for some helpful Lenten resources! Peace.