if You want me to...

ain't about how fast i get there, ain't about what's waiting on the other side...

i swear the days have gotten longer. like, straight up longer. i don't even know what day it is, and i have been catching myself nodding off to sleep. like, straight up trying my best to open my eyes from a .7 second nap only to find the teacher staring right at me. BOOM. caught. i swear, that happened probably like 10 times...in like 1 half hour session, but honestly, shoot. girl is TIRED.

we're starting to look into ways to assess the students...grading - how am i going to weight the different assignments? yeah...i need to remind myself not to take out my aggression and frustration with my past teachers' grading systems, onto my future students. mwahaha, no i wouldn't do that. it's funny because while i have already been brainstorming different assignments, my first one will be to bring in your favorite quote - a quote that inspires you. HAHAHA shocking, right? it's gonna be great! yipppeee!! my room will be a refuge for pure inspiration and wellness. :)

i swaer each day is jam-packed with different things to do, and now we have like 4 hours of free time...well, it's not exactly free time, we have things we are supposed to do, but i am taking advantage of this and using it to satisfy my technology thrist via google. i am supposed to be preparing a role play for teaching assessments, but that can wait. this is more important. :) haha it's funny - the minute we don't have things to do, we like don't know what to do with ourselves.

music has been my sanctuary and after putting on a sweet prayer workshop with michelle on prayer and reflection on our fears for our upcoming school year, i am beginning to get more and more excited about my role in campus ministry. i get the awesome opportunity to teach in the classroom, and be a campus minister to the school. excellent!

in this time of transitions, there are a lot...and we went over them today as a group. easily, these may be translated into fears...here's a little insight for you on the general case of the group...fear of maintaining relationships, oversight/forgetting, feelings of inadequancy and not being good enough, fear of homesickness, fear of not getting students to the next grade level, fear of living in community, fear of the transitions...transitions being...from the west coast to the east coast (that would be me.), from salary (5 digits) to stipend (3 digits), from picking your roommates to having your community chosen for you, from suburbs to city, from role as student to role as teacher, from eating out to cooking your own food (yeah, i might die), from circumstantial situations to being intentional in community...the list goes on. regardless, they are all transitions that we have been dealing with.

it's a lot of stress, but a lot of healthy stress too. why did God want us to be here? it is that constant reminder and the trust that keeps us here and got us here. some of my friends out here have yet to be placed in schools, but they're moving into their sites in 2 weeks. it's pure craziness, but it's pure faith too. a lot of it. a strong sense of it. sooo that is that. :o)

Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired" ~Mother Teresa